It looks like you’re reading this despite the title.

You had no choice; I was speaking to your subconscious mind.

When this pandemic started in the US, an educational campaign told people, “don’t touch your face.”  All I wanted to do was to touch my face.  The more I heard the phrase, the more I found myself itching to touching my face.

Ha! You just touched your face, didn’t you?

Why?

Studies have shown that when humans hear or read the word “don’t,” the psychological reaction is to focus on the words that come after don’t.

When you read, “don’t read this,”….well, here you are reading this!

Using “don’t” in my title had a positive outcome because I DID want you to read this.  However, negative language such as “don’t” typically leads to negative actions.

Conversely, positive words lead to positive actions.

So, the next time you find yourself about to say “don’t,” stop and think about what you DO want and reframe your words.  Here are some examples in various life contexts.

• Spouse: Instead of “Don’t forget,” say “Please remember.”
• Children: Instead of “Don’t make noise while I’m on my Zoom call,” say, “Please read quietly for the next hour.”
•  Boss: Instead of “I don’t know,” say, “Let me find out.”
• Subordinate: Instead of “Don’t be late to the meeting,” say, “Please join the call a few minutes early so we can start on time.”
• Self: Instead of “I don’t want to work so many hours,” say, “I’m working towards improving my life balance.”

You get the idea!

Share some of your examples of how you have removed the word “don’t” from your vocabulary and reframed it with positive language.

Wishing you the best!
Amy