I had an interesting experience this morning.  My neighbor’s boat broke down, and he needed a tow.

The two of us strategized how to safely tow his boat and avoid having our boats crash into each other or the docks.  We had a good plan.

Then along came some other neighbors that wanted to help.

As I navigated my boat to connect the tow rope, a group of men barked orders at me and treated me like a complete idiot who didn’t know what I was doing.

One of them asked why my husband wasn’t there to help.

This isn’t the first time that people have underestimated me.  When I find myself in these types of situations, here is how I turn things around:

Choose to RESPOND instead of REACT
Even though it might have felt good to shout back at the men, it certainly would not have helped the situation!  So, instead, I took a deep breath and chose to respond in a way that built trust and credibility by sharing my plan, acting with confidence, and demonstrating my competence.

 Share your PLAN
They assumed I didn’t know what I was doing, so I explained my plan to them.  And for an extra dose of credibility, I also shared my experience over the years with successfully towing multiple boats on the lake.

 Act with CONFIDENCE
I used a firm, matter-of-fact tone and intentionally focused on my body language to send a message of confidence.  I stood up, squared my shoulders and head, and made eye contact with each of them as I talked.  By the way, did you know that women tend to tilt their head to the side when engaged in conversation?  Men tend to interpret the head tilt as a lack of confidence.

 Demonstrate COMPETENCE
Now that I had their attention, I went into action and showed them my abilities, continuing to tell them what I was doing as I was doing it.

If you’re wondering how the story ends, I successfully towed my neighbor’s boat to the boat ramp without incident and received multiple compliments as a result.

The group of men might have been assuming incompetence due to a gender stereotype, or they might have been nervous about anyone driving the tow boat, and I just happened to be behind the wheel.  In any case, using this simple approach, I was able to build trust and credibility in 5 minutes.

Has anyone ever underestimated you?  How did you choose to respond?  Drop me a note and share your story.

Wishing you the best!